-a proud 23 trapped inside a 16 years old teen-

23
it is a beautiful number
no doubt whatsoever
it's just that
30/03/09 happened to be monday
i'd always kinda blue-ey on mondays
and various datelines and presentation and test awaits in few days to come
have mercy on me

*sigh*

the sigh is not because i feel old
i had always i'm that 16 years old teen from few years back
people would not believe i'm a gorgeous, ambitious 20+ lady when they meet me anyway

*proud*proud*

anyway
this is the last year i'm going to celebrate my day here in campus
i am going to miss these 4 years of procrastinating, lazying, pampering and such
i am going to miss all of the teases,jokes,critics,comments and such
i am going to miss everyone i met along the way

my hopes and wishes to celebrate my 23rd year in life:

• awe those at Sea Party Technology Sdn Bhd and make them beg me to stay (who do i think i am for them to beg?ahahahaha)
• pursue masters at National Taiwan Ocean University (make them send me...ahahahahaha!)
• oh~~~before i could go for these two...strike A for plant design and PSM and somehow excel in PME (Tn Haji...please have mercy on me...i know how to spend money,but to analyze its flow made me half sane)
  
• purchase Anna Sui clutch and at least one more handbag(see?i know how to spend well!)
  
• add booties and wedges into my shoes collection
• live my life to the fullest with determination,aims and dreams
• be the person who'll make my parents and religion proud and blessed by God Almighty
• walk down a steady and challenging path that leads to a steady life,maintain this relationship with the one and only 'blue lion'

i'll add some more if there's something on my mind
so this list will be a lot longer by the of 2009

*ngeeeee~~~~*

oh yeah~~

a huge,enormous, large thank you to those who wished me
i care not for the presents you shower me (if you are going to give me a pair of booties i'll be glad)
it's the thoughts that made me flutter
best wishes for you lots in the upcoming presentation

-the earth day-

had a little chit-chat with my supervisor earlier on today
discussing various issues
jumping off from final projects to industrial training to global warming to office politics

true that i have nil-zero-none-nothing experience whatsoever on office politics
true that i have no whatsoever pictorial view on office politics
but to see the effect it laid upon my ever-so-strict-highly-motivated-hardcore supervisor
made me wander all the way back to my room
and once i reached my room
i concluded office politics into my "causes of stress" list

yes...i have a list on possible causes of stress
why?
because i feel and look terrible and haywire all along when i'm stressed
since i am one of many beauty conscious young ladies out there
it is my priority to maintain my appearance in public

*grin*

anyway....
for the upcoming earth hour
i would like to share a song from cake (not edible okay so stop drooling)
hope you out there be more environment conscious
lead a healthy lifestyle (i know i don't really)
keep on strive to keep the environment as healthy as we are
every little things that we do really matters to Mother Nature

carbon monoxide by cake

Too much carbon monoxide for me to bear
Too much carbon monoxide for me to bear

Where's the air?
Where's the air?
Where's the Where's the Where's the air?
After car after bus after car after truck
After this my lungs will be so fucked up
I wish I was in that Mercedes Benz
Sealed away from my scents
I'd have the music high going 95
Too much too much too much too much

Too much carbon monoxide for me to bear
Too much carbon monoxide for me to bear
Don't you care?
Don't you care?
Don't you Don't you Don't you care?

After car after bus after car after truck
After this my lungs will be so fucked up
I wish I wasn't just a pedestrian
Breathing all this in
I look up at that grey sky
It makes me want to... (ohhhh)
Too much too much too much
Too much carbon monoxide for me to bear

-earth hour-

put aside negativity...let alone that feeling of suspicious
put aside the thoughts of hidden agenda
or the inner you saying the level of crimes and misbehave will definitely increase ten fold

this is only one of the little things we can do
to preserve Mother Nature
we are to be blame for all the environmental problems that we faced
we were the ones whom unearth the golds out of her
we were the ones whom put the hot blanket around her

one hour
for us to reflect
for us to give back
for us to contribute

this 28 March
830pm-930pm
one hour that is

i'm in
care to join?

www.earthour.org

-another two cents i found-

whatsoever has become the country today
i have been holding myself from typing anything meticulous
regarding the PPSMI agenda
but only days has passed
more news roaming about some pointless 'assembly'?

what broke and shattered my heart more
my idol in malay literature itself gave his blessing
and voiced out his strong rejection towards PPSMI

*sigh*

dalam masa satu minggu ini
aku 'merayau' secara virtual
melompat-lompat dari satu blog ke blog yang lain
yang pada mana aku baca buah fikiran mereka yang begitu kuat menolak idea PPSMI itu
kerana aku mahu tahu
apa sebenarnya hujah dasar mereka
yang merasakan bahasa inggeris itu bahasa pembunuh bahasa melayu, identit melayu, jiwa melayu

aku harapkan aku akan ketemu hujah-hujah yang boleh mematikan terus ide PPSMI
tapi sayang seribu kali sayang
sampai kini aku belum ketemu

kerana apa?
cuba kamu beritahu aku bagaimana aku harus menerima hujah-hujah yang sebegini

"adk aku x ske la blaja sains...dier cakap BI tue ssh sgt nk paham"
"sepupu aku xboleh nk excel la dlm subject tue...dier x reti BI"
"aku dh hbs cara dh nk ajar ank buah aku BI...ssh betol nk lekat"
"besh lg blaja dlm BM...senang nk paham"

*sigh*

boleh kalian semua beritahu pada aku
ilmu mana yang sesenang itu mahu dicedok?
boleh kalian semua beritahu pada aku
matapelajaran mana yang begitu senang dipelajari tanpa kamu usaha banyak mana?

apa segala ilmu pun
diajarkan dan diturunkan oleh tok guru mana pun
akan menjadi payah bagi kamu
kalau kamu tidak punya minat dan hati untuk belajar
waima diajarkan pada kamu dalam bahasa ibunda yang begitu kamu fasih
yang dibesarkan untuk lekat pada lidah kamu sedari kecil

bahasa bukan soal utama kenapa seseorang itu payah untuk memahami sesuatu ilmu
aku akui
aku seorang yang tidak berapa faham ilmu fizik
walaupun aku pelajar jurusan kejuruteraan
ilmu itu aku sudah pelajari dari alam sekolah
diajarkan pada aku dalam bahasa inggeris...aku tidak memahami apa yang dibebelkan pada aku
kemudian diterangkan lagi dalam bahasa melayu...aku masih tidak faham
dan aku masih ingat gerutu hati aku pada masa itu
"what is point of translating the same thing into another language when i cannot grasp the concept?!"

di situ baru aku tersedar
selama ini yang membuatkan aku terkebelakang bukan kerana bahasa
tapi kerana aku sendiri yang tidak punya hati dan minat untuk pelajari ilmu fizik ketika itu
aku yang tidak punya motivasi diri untuk cari jalan untuk keluar dari belengu yang aku sendiri cipta

usah guna alasan bahasa yang beda dari bahasa ibunda
yang anak remaja kini hilang minat dan kurang faham pada sesuatu ilmu
apa kata kamu hantar anak remaja itu ke mana-mana pertandingan antarabangsa
aku mahu lihat macam mana dia mahu hidup apabila dia tidak faham sepatah haram kata yang dia dengar di sana
jangan kalian jadikan bahasa sebagai pembunuh identiti dan jiwa melayu
sedangkan yang terang-terang jadi pembunuh nya ialah diri sendiri

dan oh ya....
aku masih sukakan sambal belacan walaupun aku suka sama Anelka